MP3: Djembefitta - Lars Ulrich

When Djembefitta first wrote to me and outlined their treatise of hate with regards to "typical" Göteborg indierock, I knew I had to follow up with them and learn more. This week's entry in our ongoing Gbg-spotlight series does just that.

You guys have declared war on Gbg indiepop. What is it about that stereotypical sound that makes you so angry? What do you have to offer instead? What do you hope to accomplish?

Well, me (Ronny) and Sonny were talking the other day about older Swedish women going to Gambia in Africa to find their toy boys, and we figured out it's the exact same women who enroll into Djembe drum classes. It's probably lost on an American like yourself, but anyone from here would understand what we're talking about. Gross women who take advantage of young guys.

Now that we have a really lousy singer, like all big bands from Gothenburg, we are just waiting for the fucking money to roll right in! People are so stupid!

While your distaste for the sound of Håkan Hellström/BCQ/Broder Daniel/Jens Lekman/etc. is clear, are there any Gbg bands that you actually like? Is there another local scene there worth investigating, either now or in the past?

There's no scene worth investigating really. And when we are done there will be no other scene to talk about except for the new thrash/punk scene! You should investigate older swedish women going to Gambia though. They are really nasty! Is it even legal?

Actually the only scene worth checking out in retrospect is the bay area thrash scene from 1981-1986. We fucking love the big 4. Except for Anthrax with Joey Primadonna. Plus they were really from NY.

So who are you guys exactly? Have you lived in Gbg for a long time or did you move there from somewhere else? What keeps you there? What makes Gbg better or worse than other big cities in Sweden?

If we told you who we are we would have the fucking cops and kronofogden on our asses in a split second! Plus Siewert Öholm would accuse us of being satanists.

Gothenburg is really rainy and windy and it makes us pissed off. It's a good feeling!

Next question!

What other things do you hate that you haven't written songs about yet? Is there anything that makes you happy?

We hate a lot of stuff. Not all of our songs are about hate though. Some are about getting wasted. We are happy when we are wasted. Happy drunks. We might write a song about people who buy records by bands from this city with singers who sing out of tune. They are the ones who are REALLY stupid! And they're gonna love us! Now where's my beer?

Got a song to share with our readers? Want to tell us about it?

We have this song called "Lars Ulrich". He's such an easy target, but we had to do it anyway. It's about how he can be such a lousy drummer, and still be in polls for "best metal drummer". It's almost as funny as saying Håkan Hellström is the best singer in Sweden. I wish he still wore that funny fucking sailor outfit though. He used to be so cute. Håkan that is. A funny sailor dude singing out of tune about how he's drunk and lonely and the masses go: "We love this guy!" Ha, ha! Lars Ulrich is kinda the Håkan Hellström of Metal. A funny Danish guy who's drunk and plays drums like a fucking windmill.

One last thing, what can we expect from Djembefitta in the future? Any chance you'll play live? Or put out a proper record?

If we can stay out of jail and someone gives us a shit load of money we'll do it. We are only in it for the money!

Djembefitta - Lars Ulrich